I have a recurring epiphany that pounces on me at bars sometimes: I’m so unbelievably thankful to have found my girlfriend when and where I did. When I’m at a bar and she isn’t around, I can’t help but notice people looking to make some boozy love connections and realize how hopelessly inept I would be at finding romance in such a way.
The first time these thoughts and the ensuing gratitude assaulted me, I was extremely drunk before even stepping foot in the bar. As the friends I came with went and danced, I thought to myself, “Sweet Jesus I hate dancing and if dancing were my only chance at meeting the girl of my dreams, I would certainly die alone.” I immediately drunk texted my girlfriend to let her know how lucky I was to have her.
The epiphany struck again last night when I went out for drinks with a few co-workers. A fairly nice girl was telling me about her hobby of collecting shoes (Air Jordans in particular) and showing me pictures of the pair that she has coming in the mail.
I wasn’t bored out of my mind, but there was no connection there. Sometimes I talk to people and feel like I have absolutely zero in common with them. I don’t hold it against that person and I’m certainly not rude to them.
I like hearing about other people’s lives as they would tell it. Mostly because I think that there always exists an abundance of sub-plots, half-truths, and ulterior motives between the lines; but I also enjoy comparing and contrasting my perception of the person with the perception that they try to project with their stories. There are three identities at play: Who I think they are, Who they tell me they are, and Who they really think they are. I tumbled down the rabbit hole pondering these things as I listened to her life story prior to moving to Florida. Drinking a Fat Tire, struggling to listen over the din of a mediocre house band, and contemplating some of the complexities of human nature combine for multi-tasking far beyond my capabilities. I could never have met the love of my life at a bar, and I would have become a miserable, cynical human being had I ever tried.